Testimony of God’s Overcoming Addiction Power
July 6, 2009
Hello my name is Richard, and this is my testimony of God’s overcoming addiction power:
My mother loved myself and my siblings, and as a single parent did the best she could to provide for all of our needs. Sometimes providing for us included moving; different neighborhoods, different towns, and even different states. I had changed schools at least eight times before I was thirteen. I always felt like an outsider and that I did not fit in. Having quality friendships was difficult. I had finished elementary school with exceptional grades. That changed as I entered middle school. I made friends with the wrong people, I skipped school, and ultimately began smoking marijuana and drinking. My mother moved me to my Grandparents home and I accepted Jesus Christ as my Savior for the first time. My life changed.
I missed my family and returned to Portland. I believed things would be different, but they were not. By the time I was sixteen I had experimented with hard drugs and dropped out of school. I began working full time, which afforded me to continue in the same lifestyle and at that age it was very appealing, my life was out of control. At nineteen I went through my first treatment program, passed the ASVAB test, and went into the Army. I was finally on the right track. I left all of my former life behind thinking a change of environment would solve the problem. However, I began to drink, and eventually was using cocaine again. I returned home to Oregon. In Portland the same people were still doing the same activities, nothing I wanted to be a part of, I requested a transfer to Washington to be near my family. I knew that if I just had the support of my family and church everything would turn out all right.
The problem was not the environment, or the circumstances, or the friends, it was me.
My life continued with the same patterns, but now included a destroyed marriage and disengagement from my daughter’s life due to shame, guilt, and simply not accepting responsibility for my actions. I was selfish and more concerned about my next fix than the relationships, I was not strong enough for myself or my family. I needed more.
My life got worse, and I ended up back in treatment, repeating the same cycle. This time I was clean for six months before I returned to my addictive behavior, and left my daughter’s life again. I moved again, started over again, with a new family, my second wife, I thought I could do it right this time. It did not work, again I was using cocaine. I went through treatment number three, and stayed clean for a while, but then I got careless took risks with drinking, and ended up involved in drugs again. This time crystal meth became my drug of choice. It was easier to function using meth, I reengaged in my daughter’s life, I was doing okay, or so I thought. Of course that was not true. Treatment number four, I met Jesus again and was able to restore my relationship with my daughter and stay clean for three years.
Unfortunately, I had surgery and was given pain killers which triggered a relapse for me and I stayed out again, broken relationships and financial ruin, all of it came back as if it had never left. I moved back to Portland to escape the pain and the shame.
This time as well as drugs…I found gambling and lost thousands of dollars and eventually lost myself. My mom agreed with hesitation to let me live with her back in Seattle to START OVER AGAIN! I found a job in sales and excelled. I started to acquire some wealth and was soon back using meth. I again lost everything I had and was willing to continue until I died.
I reluctantly agreed to work for my uncle who had stepped into my life at a very low point. He and his wife brought me food, talked, and prayed with me. It was then that I learned about “New Heart Place”.
God, through New Heart Place, gave me a new heart, a new mind, and yes even a new body. The training, unconditional love, and support given not only from N.H.P. but also from the body of Christ at Westgate Chapel helped me to change life-long patterns, destroy strong-holds, and restore relationships that I thought could never be repaired.
Graduation from New Heart Place was both sad and joyful. Sad because I was leaving the protected environment that I called home for that year, but joyful because I knew I was finally free from the bondage of addiction I had known for the last 20 years and that I could now participate in the life God had given me.
Comments
Got something to say?